A lot of things weighed heavily on my mind during this time. Nathan's health and Bekah's well-being, of course, were always at the top of the list. It was emotionally and physically draining living the roller coaster of a life we had been living. We did the best we could to comfort, console, and uplift each other through all of the hard times.
I don't know how I would have made it through everything with even a partial bit of sanity if it wasn't for Bekah. And hopefully she would say the same about me.
But there were many, many nights when we would lie in bed and talk about how we were doing and how things were going and what we could do to help and support each other. And the one thing that would repeatedly come up was that we didn't have any friends. We had no one to talk to and share our burdens with, other than each other.
Both of our immediate families lived hundreds of miles away, so it was hard for them to be here. I did have some extended family in the area, but they never called or stopped by to visit And all of our good, close friends also lived far away. So we were really hoping to rely on the members of our congregation for support. That is why we had decided to attend services with our local congregation rather than the services at the hospital.
But at this point, I had come to regret that decision.
What I most wanted was a friend. Someone to come over to our house, sit down, talk to us, and really see how we were doing. But the most we ever got was a 2-minute "How's your son?" in between meetings at Church. Occasionally, we'd get a "We're praying for you." Which only served to upset me more.
As Nathan kept being sick, one of the things I would routinely pray for was for someone to come over and to just be a friend. I don't know how to express properly the earnestness and fervor with which I prayed night after night after night. But that particular prayer always went unanswered.
Occasionally, I would offer up some sort of compromise prayer and tell God that I was willing to accept a phone call in place of a visit, but the phone never rang either.
To say the least, it was very disheartening.
But perhaps the most frustrating and upsetting part was the complete lack of action on the part of the leaders of our congregation.
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